God has been dealing with my heart about parenting. For us as a family & for the church. Here are some of the thoughts and scriptures he has been giving me. I recently taught a class to some of the ladies from the church and these are the notes - This was the first time for me to teach in spanish.
Parenting
To be a parent is a huge responsibility. One that is not to be taken lightly. God has give you a child. In many ways it is like a small seed, and the quality of life and fruit that this tree will one day bare is greatly impacted by the gardener.
You are the gardener. It is your job to cultivate a healthy soil. In Matthew 13:3-9 Jesus tells a parable of farmer sowing seed, lets read this passage. Verse 8 says “Still other seeds fell on fertile soil, and they produced a crop that was thirty, sixty, and even a hundred times as much as had been planted!”.
Now lets read Matthew 13:18-23. There are two things that see are important: Deep roots. Good Soil. Here in verse 23 we see what it is to have good or fertile soil. It says that those will good ground will do three things: hear the word, understand the word, bear fruit, bring forth.
Today we are talking about cultivating this good soil (hearts) in our children. We are going to focus on 3 areas:
What God says about parenting:
(Deuteronomy 6:4-9)
Biblical examples of instructing / teaching children:
(Proverbs 3:21-27, 4:20-27, 6:20-22, 7:1-3)
How to cultivate a child’s heart:
(Proverbs 22:6)
What God says about parenting:
Before we are able to teach our children or cultivate their hearts the way that God desires we have to let go of our own ideas of parenting and began to seek God’s plan. As we look at the first commandment God gave us as parents we begin to see His heart towards parenting. Let’s read Deuteronomy 6:4-9.
He says that we are to know who He is (The lord our God is One) and we are to love Him with all of our heart, soul, and might. After these things are in OUR heart we are to teach them DILIGENTLY to our children. This phrase to teach diligently means to sharpen, to teach (incisively), to inculcate any thing on any one.
Inculcate means to:
1. Instill (an attitude, idea, or habit) by persistent instruction.
2. Teach (someone) an attitude, idea, or habit by such instruction: "they will try to inculcate you with a respect for culture".
I find it interesting that to teach diligently means to sharpen. In Psalms 127:4 it says, “As arrows [are] in the hand of a mighty man; so [are] children of the youth.”
God has commanded you - mothers, and grandmothers to first love God with all of your heart, but then to sharpen your children. To prepare them for the callings and purposes that God has for their lives. In 2 Timothy 1:5 Paul tells Timothy that the unfeigned faith that he had was first in his grandmother and his mother. God has placed your children in your life for you to impart faith, understanding, and truth.
Biblical examples of instructing / teaching children:
According to Wikipedia, the words “my son” appear in the book of Proverbs some 20 times. The role of a mother is listen some 10 times.
I want us to take a few minutes and look at biblical examples of “sharpening” children. Listen closely to the tone of these passages:
Proverbs 3:1-10
Proverbs 4:20-27
Proverbs 6:20-22
Proverbs 7:1-3
What do you hear in the tone of these passages? (Care, Guidance, Explanations) He is saying “My son, remember what I have taught you, write it on your heart, keep it in your heart ... and everything will be ok”. The book of Proverbs covers “heavy topics”: adultery, lying, relationships, honesty, and wisdom. They are practical steps for living a pure, Godly life. Just reading the book of Proverbs to them, or making them read it themselves is not the answer. These are the things we need to be putting into our own words and teaching our children. Make it real for them.
Today I want to give you some resources. Our kids are smart and you can’t fool them. It is important that your life is devoted to knowing the word so that you are able to teach them. It takes time. It takes effort. It takes discipline.
And GOD HAS COMMANDED you to do it! You do not want to take it lightly.
(give out resources)
How to cultivate a child’s heart:
Lets look at one last thing in the Bible before leaving, Proverbs 22:6. This phrase, “train up” = “chanak” means to put something into the mouth, to give to be tasted. It was a common metaphor in which taste is applied to understanding. It is said that in this time midwives would dip a piece of cloth into smashed dates or grapes and then apply it to the babies mouth. The babies would begin to suck. Its believed that the babies inners were cleaned, and an appetite was created.
Psalms 34:8 says, “O taste and see that the LORD [is] good:” Our goal is to create an appetite for the things of God. When our children begin to taste of the things of God they will also begin to understand and will be cleansed. They will crave the things of God and live Godly lives. Hearts that are sensitive to His leading.
This is our responsibility. The world “child” in this verse is used to describe anyone up to the age of marriage.
One thing we must keep in mind is that God has created each of unique. We have different talents, different strengths and weaknesses. This is why we should not compare our children to each other or to the children of others. You need to know each of your children as individuals. Get to know their strengths and weaknesses.
When read Matthew 13:23 in the beginning. It says that those who had good soil, or a well prepared heart would bear fruit, and the fruit would ripen. Then it says “some an hunderedfold, some sixty, some thirty” ... the important thing is that our children’s hearts are good soil for whatever harvest God has for them to do.
Let His unique will be done for their lives. Do not try to copy what God has done in someone else. Affirm them.
Here are some resources for your journey!
Children:
Kids of Integrity: KidsofIntegrity.com is a website that has EVERYTHING you need to teach your children to develop Godly character and live lives of integrity.
Moms:
The book of Proverbs
Thriving Family: thrivingfamily.com is a ministry of Focus on the Family that focuses on raising children. It is an incredible resource!
Family Life Today: familylife.com is a website filled with articles and audio resources for parenting and marriage.
Mom Life Today: momlifetoday.com is a website where everything is for you to be the mom God desires you to become. There are online free Mom e-mentoring where you can ask questions about parenting. There is information for single moms, moms of special needs children, blended families, marriage, and more.
Focus on the Family: focusonthefamily.com is a site where you will find both spanish and english information. Enfoque a la Familia is the completely spanish site.
Enfoque a la Familia: enfoquealafamilia.com is filled with articles and audio teaching on parenting and marriage. This site does not have as many resources as the other sites, but is all in spanish!
