Mar 13, 2007
This morning everyone's gone. Everyone. René and my Pops are painting these candlestick things for the wedding (which are going to be AMAZING), Riley just left for school, & My mom is on her way to Springfield. I've been having a low-key, laid back morning. (putting off the many things I have to do before um TOMORROW!) ;) but it's nice and quite and i'm enjoying! Somehow I've gotten lost in thoughts of How on earth I ended up here..Like I am.. How did i change so much ... wow. Life takes so many changes ... I started thinking about the quote I heard a while back it was something like ... in the long run you don't regret what you do, you regret the things you never do ... as I was thinking about that, I also started thinking about how without realizing it random decisions I've made through the years have also brought better things into my life ... For example as I've pulled away from things .... things that pulled me down, some were actually wrong while others weren't wrong ... but like i said, they pulled ME down in someway ... I started to see how every time I gave up those pointless little things better things came to into my life ... there were many times when compromise was right there waiting, and for some reason i walked away ... and without my realizing it life got better ... there were rewards ... over and over again you might even call them "blessings" in many ways i've walked blinded to the blessing that kept coming to me ... now i see they came because i was seeking something ... something more ... I was pulling away from those things, that old mind set that kept pulled me back - selfish desires and pleasures - and now, now that i've pulled away, now that i've diligently sought after His desires ... i'm also beginning to see how true it is that HE is a rewarder of them that seek after His ways. Sure they are higher than our ways ... that's why we must let go for those things which pull us back, that take our focus from His desires, His plans, His purpose - we must release ourselves from those things which hold us back .... and seek. Now here today i find myself stocked full of this new life ... this new life that came to me ... how wonderful it is. What peace there is here. I never dreamed His will could hold this much peace. Could feel this good. Now I relax, I find rest ... here in all sorts of chaos ... there is still peace. it feels so good. ;)
Heb. 6:11
Wedding in 2.45 days! Now there's something to wag your tail about! haha get it? ;)
